July 08, 2008

Piece of Cake?

Yesterday was my baby Rolan's second birthday and, while Ridge loves his brother, he did not love the adoring shower of attention Rolan received. By the third or fourth phone call singing Happy Birthdy over the speaker phone, he went into a full-on protest, demanding that it was HIS birthday.
He's enjoyed the birthday parties for a long time now, but it was sometime in the last year that he has become so passionate about attendance. And, it really doesn't matter whose birthday it is. As long as he gets cake, ice cream and, most of all, to run in circles screaming like a clothed animal, he's beyond content. I'm sure conincids with Mollie's ridicules bonanzas she organizes for months before each of her four kids' parties, so I guess I'm gonna lay blame for all this obscene behavior at her feet.
Ridge normally has no problem with some other kid being the guest of sugary honor, but I suppose all the pinata-stuffing and icing-whipping was just too close in proximity for him to willingly let this be his brother's birthday. By the time Rowdy made it in last night from a long, hot day of work, Ridge shut down any musicial celebrating he planned.
Since the birthday party, ***insert sarcasm*** an utter joy for momma's everywhere, isn't until tonight, I didn't bake the cakes until last night. I pulled the two round cakes out of the over, placed them on a cooling rack and started a phone interview for The Elk Citan. In case you don't know, The Elk Citian is the newspaper I contribute to weekly and if you aren't reading it, you should be. Can you imagine how much of my literary genius you are missing?
Anyways, while I was speaking with the little girl I wrote about today, Ridge rallied Rolan away from the television they were suppose to watching and the two snuck into the kitchen. Because I was in the kitchen, leaning against one of the counters while taking notes, I'm particularily amazed and, frankly, impressed that the two were able to sneak by me without a peep.
Now, because I didn't actually see these two little shits in action, I don't actually know how this went down. So, I'm just gonna guess.
Rolan can get himself on the counter, but he's still unsteady and awkward in his maneuvers. As I said, I didn't hear a peep until the destructive mayhem was beyond repair. I had moved the cakes far enough back on the counter that there is no way the boys could've reached them without vertical action of some sort. For that reason, I have to assume Ridge, a crafty, experienced climber, was the culprit.
By the time I realized what was going on, one of the round cakes was dumped on the floor and my darling boys were circled around it like a starving pack of dogs on an injured cat. Needless to say, the cake could not be salvaged. Perhaps I should have let this two urchins finish what they had started, satsifying all the sugar cravings I so rarely let them indulge in. After all, they'd already eaten half of it off the floor in two big bites a piece. I had just mopped, so I'm sure it was all saturated in that toxic, but lovely smelling Orange Pine-Sol.
But, I was pissed. Thank God I hadn't decorated it yet because I probably would've had a break down. And not because of the sticky mess it would have created. Decorating cakes is time consuming, in case you have never done it.
So, there you go. If you make it to Rolan's party tonight, and I sincerely hope you do, smile when you see the cake.

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