October 26, 2008

The Offspring Rising Has Conquered the Internet: BOOBY DUTY EDITION

After my last post about my darling spawn's new dominance of the computer, the result of which has left me booted off my blog, I received several comments and private messages from other parents lamenting the same overtaking by their children. Now, I don't know how many of you read the comments, so I wanted to leave one of the best on the front page.
She warns of the pervy future of computer searches of my sons. And because I chose to reproduce with the King of the Pervs, I absolutely know the scenario Lorie laid out will definitely play out. (Poet alert, poet alert!
Lorrie said:

Sure at 4 they are all about Thomas The Tank Engine, then before you know it, they are seven, and you check your google history and someone has typed in SEXY BOOBS and why, yes, that DID happen to me.

Learn from my mistakes. Force them to read books.

I thought this was some pretty awesome shit. He googled "SEXY BOOBS." I absolutely love that he threw some descriptive words in there, as though BOOBS alone wouldn't have sufficed. Just for fun (not at all because I'm secretly kinda a 7-year-old pervy boy), I went ahead a googled it. Ahhhh.......if I wasn't already worshipping at the House of Google, I would be now.
The very first website on the list is a classy little location called "Booby Duty." Immediately, I was overcome by jealously of the genius mind who brainstormed this. Clearly for accurate research purposes only, I had to click on it. Well, I am here to tell all of you, Lorrie included, that the folks behind this site have somehow managed to find a collection of the biggest jugs on Earth. I mean, one or two pairs like these watermelon-sized breasts would be impressive, but they managed to accumulate a collection every spine surgeon would dream of. And as I looked over the site, my mouth hung wide open as a pop can, I could only think how many future backaches would plague that page. The words "bulging disc" swirled around my mind, I think that in itself is a testament to how old I have gotten.
So, thank you, Lorrie, for sharing tales of what my future holds so I can laugh here in the present. As most mothers of sons will testify, we spend a lot of time trying to understand the workings of our male offsprings' minds. Good stuff, good stuff.

Oh, and those of you who live in or near Elk City, Oklahoma, don't forget the benefit dinner and auction for Jamie Munford this afternoon at the Gathering Place from 4-6.

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Suzanne said...

There are just too many reasons why I adore you.

That said, beware. You will now get lots and lots of hits for "sexy boobys" and "booby duty." It's been a while since I wrote about the crazy shit people type in on google before they wind up (disappointed) at my blog, but "Jewish pussy" is the number one search term. I have probably now made it worse for you, if comments count in google searches. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

We are a multi-computer family. We had to be...or someone was going to leave here in a body bag.

Finish This Page, but click on the older posts, too.

The knee-slappin,' cursin,' GOOD TIMES don't start or end on the front page, so read the older posts! Maybe you missed something. Maybe you forgot. I try to post daily, so read the older posts!
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