December 19, 2008

The Cowboy Chronicles, Apparent Home of Naughty Nuns

As I'm sure you already know, I'm not super techy. This blog's mere existence is a profound miracles. As far as miracles are concerned, it goes that time Jesus awoke from the dead, that time Moses parted the Red Sea, a never-ending pool of hood rats willing to make themselves national laughing stocks for a shot at Bret Michael's old bandanna-clad ass and then The Cowboy Chronicles being halfway navigational. That's right, I put the conception of this site above the conception of my kids on the miracle list. That doesn't mean I don't love my boys more, I do, but making them only entailed a little loving and then a bunch of laying around and bitching because everybody else could drink beer while I sweltered into a sweaty, pregnant blob in the Oklahoma heat. I may have done a lot of bellyaching about the swollen feet and heartburn, but truthfully, my pregnancies were a cakewalk in comparison to the early days of my blog.
As I've stumbled through my journey of the World Wide Web, I've periodically learned new things that are apparently as second nature to most bloggers as breathing and backtracks. The first was Twitter. Mollie had to explain it to me like 17 times before I understood what the hell she was talking about. I'm still learning my way around it, though I think I've figured it out. I could go on and on, Technorati, BlogHer, layouts. It was like a completely undiscovered, unexplored village existing and thriving within the Internet.
Most recently I found Google Analytics. I know all you geeky, HTML whiz kids are laughing your techy asses off as you read this. Yes, I have been living under a rock. It's called Oklahoma.
Anyways, Google Analytics may sounding boring and, mostly it is. However, it does give us some big steaming pile of awesome and that would be a full list of what random key words folks type into search engines that somehow brings them to me. Looking over this list, you would probably think I'm running some sort of porn site for the devoutly religious. Of course, I did halfway blog about these subject, so I will link that posts that I think are driving these folks to my blog. If you are a new reader, I guess you should read these and see for yourself if you are on a blog about some quirky, bitchy Oklahoma ranchwife or if you are really on a covert smug site. You tell me.
So, without further ado, I give the shinning stars of my keywords list:

3. sexting examples

4. spongebob conspiracy

16. booby duty

17. catlic girls gone wild

18. charlie sheen (as a cowboy)

19. charlie sheen has hairplugs

23. how schools should handle sexting

28. jason biggs douchenozzle
I really have no idea how my blog came up this, but I did write about Dane Cook being a total asshat.

33. mozel tov hat

37. nuns gone bad

**38. nuns who eat snatch

45. sarah palin hooters

47. bill clinton hummer

Now, if you just happen to be one of the folks who found me from the above-mentioned searches, don't be ashamed. Come on out and announce yourself. Clearly a Greater Power is pulling the two of us together. Maybe it's God, maybe it's your apparent love for naughty nuns and their eating habits and Charlie Sheen's bizarre hair patterns. I don't know, I'm just glad you are here.

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Mollie Reidland said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Ha ha! Sarah Palin hooters.

For Myself said...

Combine Sarah Palin hooters and bill clinton hummers. Just for fun. Throw in Carlie and the randy nun if you're feeling really zany. This is a great site~ I will DEFINITELY be back!!

for a different kind of girl said...

I've not been on my Analytics for a long time because it wasn't working for me, or it said I didn't exist, something crazy like that. I know jack squat about anything that requires code or HTML. My blog is a steaming mess of blah!

However! I am now, without question, going to start using the word douchenozzle CONSTANTLY! That's some awesome right there!

Mollie Reidland said...

I guess I am almost as much as an attention whore as you because I came back to this page just to read my name up there.

Jebus, I am awesome.

Anonymous said...

I'm with Mollie on this one...
Since all three of us are waaayyy horny for dirty nuns, perhaps we should start a commune. I hear beetles are the 'IN' thing...harharhar.

Lorrie Veasey said...

OMG you have POP UP ADS. I am so freeking impressed.

i love me my Google Analyics. especially the map. I just wonder who the hell in istanbul decided to visit my blog.

Eme and let me know how this second round of Dooce went.

Anonymous said...

I have a confession to make....I have no idea what half of those things mean. It's alright. I'm just in it for the comments!!! Bwahahahaha!

Anna Lefler said...

Hey, there!

Anna Lefler here, reporting for booby duty.

What? It's not on? But Google, man!

Well, poop.

Merry Christmas anyway!

:^) Anna

Irish Gumbo said...


One should not read about naughty nuns when one has just taken a big mouthful of tea (or any other liquid for that matter), tends to make for a messy computer screen!

Hey, thank you for the comment luv on my post of last Thursday. I didn't mean to make ya cry! Trust me, I can make you laugh too! :)

As a show of my appreciation, I have an award for you, you can pick it up on IG, upper right hand corner. Hope you like! Come back and see me!

Suzanne said...

Here's what I got:

1. draw erodic femail
2. bull statue in nyc
3. stains in panty crotch
4. beaver shots
5. hairy snatch
6. santa naughty tied up
7. silicone mishap
8. jewish pussy
9. over 50 pussy
10, sarah silvermans snatch

Finish This Page, but click on the older posts, too.

The knee-slappin,' cursin,' GOOD TIMES don't start or end on the front page, so read the older posts! Maybe you missed something. Maybe you forgot. I try to post daily, so read the older posts!
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